Why Divorce?

There are a few things in life that puzzles one. I cannot help but wonder why couples, who used to swear to live by each other, kiss, make love and think about each other all day, suddenly, become irritants to each other. The lips that once professed love, now spill curses and despise. Why do humans change all of a sudden? Is love floatable? Does it come and go that easily? Today I am in love and tomorrow I am out of love with the one I have professed love to? What is love? Is it like the wind that blows past by? Is it like a drug of ecstasy that is powerful but temporary?

Every year, thousands of marriages take place around the world, so now is the equaling figure of marital divorces too. Have you attended a wedding before? Can you equate the expression of love and joy that goes with it especially those that flow from the wedding couple during wedding? Would you foresee a future for the couple of they being apart and divorced after the sacred vows of I dos that they expressed to each another?

The truth is that marriage is losing is sacredness in the eyes of some these days. It is becoming nothing more than a mere business merger, a human contract that is devoid of any sanctity. For some it is nothing more than a boy and a girl relationship, each, thinking of what he or she stands to get out of the relationship. Watch a few Hollywood romance movies, the advice some characters give to friends in troubled marital relationships, is to go for what will make them ‘happy,’ that is, if the relationship does not give them the happiness they seek at the moment, they can either end it or find someone who can.

Can marriage be free of challenges? Who says it is fun and crises free all the way? Must one chicken out so quickly when crises come? Is any human relationship devoid of conflicts or frictions? How can a couple who so freely profess love for each other before our eyes now tell us that they now feel that were not truly meant for each other ? That the marriage was a mistake? That they were not compatible? That they are negotiating divorce? I can’t help but wonder?

Look at the astronomical increase in the numbers of divorce figures in the country today. What are they reasons for it? Who is to blame? What went wrong? Has marriage changed face? Many may know one or two why this is so that many marriages are failing. How come some of us know the reasons why it is so and still we can’t make better of our marriages but watch them continue to slide down the cliff? How come some boast about being in their third, fourth, sixth marriages and even more, without shame for their failings? Isn’t that a pointer to the truth in the saying that some never learn from their mistakes? How does this set of people view marriage? Is it not a one night stand? Remain when the going is good?

Marriage is honorable. To throw it to the dogs, I mean courts, when all is not well should not be the ultimate solution. There are better avenues that one could consult. Speak to your pastor about it, reason with your spouse about the challenges that confront your marriage, talk to a counselor and pray about your challenges.
Even if you have met some one today that you think is all perfect and better than your husband or wife and for whom you wish to forsake your marriage and children for and perhaps remarry with, the truth remains that no marriage is made in heaven and no man or woman is perfect. Today you are high on his or her gestures of pre-marital romance just like you felt when you first met your estranged husband or wife. It is a matter of time, the bubble will burst and you shall see the other sides of the one you are thinking of being with or you have left other people for. Let’s learn to appreciate what we have.

I look forward to the day most couples grow old together, be good examples to their children on how to deal with marital issues. I look forward to when society will have very few broken homes and, no abandoned children on the streets due to the wrong choices of parents. I say very few broken homes because I know some have chosen a mind set of failure. Marriage is beautiful, let us not throw it to the dogs. Each individual is responsible for the success of his or her marriage to someone. There is never another to blame, never!

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